What a great topic raised by a participant in my Live class – a wonder about conflict avoidance.  Confronting conflict is like navigating a cave with little light, but you keep looking for glints of brightness to guide you.  As you meet bumps along the way, I encourage you to keep going.

If you are doing JUST enough to keep your intimacy going, you are likely fearful of conflict and need to invite it in as part of a developing, healthy relationship. 

Possibly, you take extreme measures to avoid conflict because it arouses terror.  In this case I suggest you begin working with placing a picture in your mind of what you look like confidently standing your ground. Continue assertive, positive mind images regardless of the reaction you receive. 

Next, work on expressing verbal phrases that begin with “I” such as,

I …

wish to set a time to chat about us
invite us to talk about sex so I understand more
want to try something different, could we go deeper about intimacy
saw something interesting and wish to hear your ideas about it
would like to know more about pleasing you

For those who are reading this, it's critical that you acknowledge your intention to handle conflict with good choices, wording and actions.  Do understand that to get your needs met you must be willing to first identify your needs .  After you know what you need, I encourage you to express them as directly and calmly, confidently as possible. 

Blessings for your loving you and yours, continuously

If this topic resonated and you’d like to have a conversation about what it would look like when you create the love relationship you’ve dreamed of schedule a chat with me.  

Best Things Are Coming To You in 2021, much love from Nancy and her crew